Yes, another Runtz review. The Patriots are a good football team, the government will never care about you more than their rich donors, and Runtz is just good weed. Some things in life are unavoidable.
Even if you’re all Runtz-ed out, you should at least give this review a quick scroll because these deep dark, dastardly girls we got from Eugreen Farms are just downright sinister looking.
These Galactic Runtz were purchased on a trip to Seaside Oregon, and then Canon Beach, where we stopped at Oasis in Seaside for a couple of pre-rolls and some heavy-hitting Gummy Buds RSO gummies and then Oregrown on Canon Beach for these gorgeous Galactic Runtz flower.
The talented Terpsmashers and Soil Goons at Eugreen grew the Galactic Runtz. They are a farm that we think quite highly of, having sampled a fair amount of their product over the years as they consistently produce beautiful, terpene-packed puppies.
Eugreen No-Till is just what they are, a no-till organic cannabis grower and that’s where you are going to get the most flavorful cannabis as a healthy soil microbiome is key to enabling a plant’s genetics to do what they do and flourish to their fullest.
Strains worth copping include their impeccable GMO Cookies as well as the Oregon fan favorite Donny Burger.
But onto the A.S.S review of this strain, with ASS standing for Appearance, Smell, and Sensation. This was a particularly fun one because this isn’t your standard-issue cannabis…
Appearance: Galactic Goodness So Dark it Looks Out of this World, Literally
Seriously, this bud is murdered the fuck out! I love dark flower. The darker, the better!
Sirius Black by Oregron Breeders Group is one of my all-time favorites because of its’ freakishly dark color and corresponding slightly-over-riped grapes smell and flavor.
Well, this Galactic Runtz is as dark as the cosmos itself, such a dark purple in fact that it almost looks black.
Inky and deep, I’d easily get lost in the depths of this black hole of a bud if it weren’t for the occasional fleck of deep dark forest green to remind me that I am indeed looking at cannabis.
I’ve seen other instances of Galactic Runtz that weren’t quite so dark and had greener, more like a 70% dark, 30% green ratio, whereas this Galactic sheeiz is damn near 90% black and 10% green (minus the orange stigma and desert sand trichome dusting).
So I don’t think it was named after it, but at least this instance I have could easily conjure the “Galactic” name because looking in the jar feels like looking into the cosmos itself, dominated by black unknown with smatterings of what looks like dust strewn about that play host to galaxies and solar systems.
It’s a damn sexy weed. One day Prada will be doing collaborations with geneticists and cultivators, and their product will look like this. Bag appeal on top of bag appeal.
Smell: A Friendly Funk with Plenty of Familiar Notes
Slightly sour funk resting on top of a reassuringly creamy base of that Gelato that is one of Runtz parent strains (Zkittles x Gelato).
Yes, I am understanding why we picked this now. It’s got enough mystery and funk to make you want to raise an eyebrow, but before that single eyebrow raise turns into a frown, you’re hit with that “nice guy” Runtz persona of sweet cream.
It’s that blend of the funk with the cream and slight sugary overtone that makes it intriguing but not so foreign that it’s suspect.
Translated into flavor, this was more cream and a bit of must with the very slightest sweetness on the exhale. Less fruity than other Gelato-heavy strains I’ve had.
This instance of Galactic Runtz is one that is more moderate in its flavor profile, with no one note jumping out above the rest. It’s a classical, slightly sweet, and smooth mouthful.
Everyone has a different nose on them, and we all very obviously prefer different scents as individuals, so give this one a smell for yourself if you see it at your neighborhood dispensary.
Sensation: Paranoia-free Brain Expansion and Introspection
I wouldn’t suggest this strain for a beginner. There’s not much subtly in the onset of this high. Joints help throttle the train a bit, but water pipes will leave you bracing for impact because this is a hitter.
NOT a hitter like a flammable AF gassy sativa but a hitter like Barry Bonds, smashing directly into your brain, letting you know that you are now high mother fucker, we’re doing this!
I’m not trying to be scary. Yes, the high is intense, but not in a racy, loose grip on how time is passing type sativa. Think more of a big hug from one of your best fat friends that you haven’t seen in a while. The embrace is real, and it feels great.
Activities this strain would pair well with include movie watching, picnicking, or hanging by the pool because it kickstarts your mind in the beginning but then fades to a more traditional relaxing indica fog.
Social situations or scenarios where I need to pay attention might be challenging after the first 15-20 minutes starts to slow down into the long mellow finale.
Additional Smoking Notes
Galactic Runtz gets your mind churning up front, and that will run for a while, so be prepared for a good think. This active mind effect, though, makes one more prone to jumping down mental rabbit holes than it does to maintaining presence and focus.
As the intensity begins to wain, a very strong sedation kicks in, at least in the body. This is one of those strains where the night began with excited banter, a bit of TV, and then a good long while lying on the floor, unable to get up from pondering the more subtle nuances of life.
The end effect was kind of a sleep paralysis wherein your mind is aware, but your body just doesn’t want to move. Of course, this isn’t like the real medical condition so eventually, I did manage to pull myself off the floor with the motivator being some zucchini cake with ice cream on top.
