Boomer weed was different. It was different times. But does hippie grass still have a role to play in 21st-century cannabis innovation?
Yeah, this is one of those generational posts once again highlighting how younger people are superior in every way to every generation that came before them. So what? Come at me, ya geezers!
I write that with 100% sarcasm. Before hating, it’s important to acknowledge that SOME of these “boomers” were also at the forefront of the resistance to the bullshit war on drugs.
The legalization so many enjoy today, in good part, can trace its roots back to activism and protests of the 60s and 70s.
Maybe the entire generational argument of who has the best weed is moot? Isn’t it our goal, evolutionarily speaking, to make every new generation the best generation yet? Isn’t that Darwinism or something, evolution?
Perhaps it’s not actually controversial at all to say younger generations are generally improvements over the older ones, including the sticky icky they cultivate.
No, I’m not looking for any beef. Just the opposite, in fact. Your boomer weed is inferior to our weed in every measurable way.
What IS boomer weed, you may be wondering? Well, it also goes by grass, dope, jazz cabbage, electric lettuce, Thai sticks, and perhaps the most boomery of them all; “Nixon.”
Our modern-era cannabis looks better, smells better, grows bigger, grows faster, has more THC, has more CBD, has more flavorful eXoTiC terpene profiles, and is being cultivated in computer-optimized environmental control systems and mars-colonization-quality nutrient blends to produce, by every single measurable means, better weed than your boomer weed.
THC concentrations increased by .29% each year between 1970 and 2017
–Addiction
But, as anyone who loves Harley Davidsons, vintage cars, Shasta soda, and Kirkland hotdogs can attest to, sometimes things that are in some (often many) measurable ways “technically: inferior to competing braaaaands can also at the same time be the “preferred” option.
Sometimes this boils down to an underlying, indescribable intangible that connects with us on an abstract, deep, emotional level. It’s love vs. lust, serenity over fireworks, simplicity over complexity, fond memory vs. forgotten, and good honest nostalgia.
To me, boomer weed is like a Snickers bar. Or Klondike bar. Or a root beer float. They’re good simple, affordable treats. They’re sweet, and they give you a smile.
Nobody gives a fuck where the cocoa beans came from, what percent cocoa that coating is, if the cows that produced the milk for that ice cream were grass-fed, or if that root beer had real ginger root in it or not.
But, if any of those foodie-related parallels above piqued any bit of interest deep in your stubborn boomer soul, then you should really give todays young person’s weed a shot.
Cannabis isn’t some winner-takes-all cage fight to the death competition. Genetics are passed down. Children are born. Ever-growing masses of consumers drift towards certain flavors and effects, and those winning plants’ genetics continue down the never-ending waterfall that is history.
The result of this natural selection process is some of the most dazzlingly intense smoking experiences one can have.
Potency of illicit cannabis plant material increased from an average of 4% in 1995 to 12% in 2014.
–Biol Psychiatry
While I don’t personally understand it, from its cultural importance at least, I suspect that cannabis is on par with wine in terms of how cultishly obsessed people can get about it, chasing ever-shrinking Alice In Wonderland rabbit holes of nuance off into obscurity and, ultimately, geek Valhalla.
One can simultaneously appreciate the nostalgia and often, if not regularly, indulge in it for the deep emotional fuzzy feeling it will impart, AND also like a bit of 80%, single-origin, all-female owned, fair-trade, organic co-op in Africa-produced dark chocolate.
You can puff on some no-name mid shake and have an absolutely fantastic time. That’s the beauty of cheap weed as well..you can smoke more of it and be generally more functional than when you get blitzed on some chronic
Sometimes, often times it seems actually life isn’t just about a pleasurable destination but instead about extending and drawing out life’s fleeting pleasurable moments along the way for as long as we can.
So like a pasty 300lb just-turned-21-year-old frat Chad prefers his carbonated, slightly beer-flavored Busch Light tall boys over the art-student-become-art-teacher 8.5% DoubleShitt IPAs, so can you enjoy some calm OG grass. You can hammer back Busch Light all day long, maximizing the duration of his drunken pleasure.
Cheap weed is a great way to stay manageably high for a very long time if that’s what you want to do. You can also smoke deliciously flavorful, potent weed when you feel like that.
Think of different grades for different applications. Sports cars and off-roaders, classical vs. electronic, red bull vs. green tea.. life is full of options.
Another benefit of weaker old-timer weed is you’re less likely to get super paranoid from a couple of puffs of the pot, making it perhaps a more beginner-friendly way to ease people into the world of cannabis.
Personally, I like being able to get high, but not too high that it consumes my thoughts. Like being a day-walker, smoking on some cheap allows me to walk amongst the sobers undetected, all while still having a preferably elevated sensory experience.
Sweet and sour, dry ice, ying and yang, how life seems to love to play with dualities, there should be a place in everyone’s heart for boomer weed just as there should be for OCD-Oliver’s entirely-encrusted-in-trichome-frost-SuperDankGarlicBreathMintz 3.0.
