Yes, it’s another gelato strain review. Yes, I do smoke other things that don’t have gelato in their genetics. No, I’m not going to stop writing reviews about gelato strains because they just fuckin rock and thus deserve the unabashed chordling.
Gelato is also sometimes referred to as Larry Bird because the original phenotype that blew up was #33, the same jersey number NBA star Larry Bird wore. People also say it’s because the nugs are huge and dense, but I Googled Larry Bird and those aren’t the first words that come to mind, so I think that explanation is bullshit.
Also, I must point out credit where credit is due and the fact that this is a Cookies Fam staple will turn some super hip anti-conformists off; to me, it earns my respect because even if you don’t vibe with the branding or whatever, that doesn’t invalidate the genius of Jigga’s work.
Anyways, without writing a book about the history of the Gelato strain let me get into THIS specific review which is about a particular cousin of ‘ol lato called Stuffed Cherry Gelato.
Yeah, it’s the full leather-lined extra dulce deluxe strains for me, and we got another one here for review, grown by the Diocese of Dank, the Sultans of Sticky, the one, the only, High Noon Cultivation.
This farm ranks right at the top for me, along with Focus North, Fox Hollow Flora, and Eugreen, as growers that always come to mind when people ask who they should look for in Oregon.
Stuffed Cherry Gelato is a cross between Lemon Cherry Gelato and Stuffed French Toast. Lemon Cherry Gelato is something I’d love to smoke as is because I haven’t met a Gelato I didn’t like.
Stuffed French Toast is itself a cross between Perris OG and Face On Fire from Archive Seedbank. Two apparently big-time early-2000s strains I haven’t seen around, but I’m curious now.
Appearance: Knobby Squatty Little Bastards
Some people really like smooth, uniform weed blob-shaped nugs, while others like the more knobby, even popcorn-y nugs. Like with humans, nugs come in all shapes and sizes and surface textures, and they’re all beautiful in their own way.
This Stuffed Cherry Gelato is more on the knobby side, but there are still some vestigial faded green leafy bits, although they’re hard to see under the thick dusting of creamy, lightly green-looking trichomes. Looks like Yoda’s dandruff.
Overall color is this army jungle fatigue green with darker splotches of shadow permeating the in recesses of the boulder-y surface area.
Size would be medium, I’d say, maybe slightly on the larger side of medium. Density isn’t the thickest, but what these flowers lack in uniform density they make up for with more total surface area from which to sprout their long, dusty trichomes.
Overall, I’d say bag appeal is solid if you’re sharing with an aficionado of the dank. If you’re sharing it with a layperson, it probably won’t impress as much since it doesn’t exhibit any particularly vibrant hues outside of a few hints of purple darkness here and there.
Smell: Sweet Beachside Breeze
Imagine a future when weed isn’t just legal it’s finally been fully accepted by society as a totally chill thing to do.
Now imagine relaxing on a canvas beach chair, and blazing one of the creamiest gelatos you’ve ever smoked with the faint whiff of freshly blended Mai Tai and the sweetest, savouriest tang of some slow-cooked pork.
The salty warm cool breeze rolling through the palms tells you evening is approaching.
But you just want to enjoy the moment a little longer, so you lay back on your canvas beach chair and close your eyes for a minute.
That’s kind of what Stuffed Cherry Gelato smells like. It’s more complex than your average Gelato while still firmly remaining a resident of CREAM Town, population: not enough.
There’s an echo of a dank, kushy velvet quality and just enough sweetness to make it a B-tier sweet strain. If you’re hoping for a cherry bomb, this ain’t it. If there’s cherry, it’s real earth-grown cherry, not some candied one.
Its smell wasn’t “blow me away”, but it was good enough, with an interesting enough name, from a trustworthy farm, that I bought a quarter ounce of it over everything else Oregrown had on that trip, so that’s saying something.
Flavor is smooth and puffy. It doesn’t cling around and doesn’t jump off the tongue. It’s a smooth gelato; a moderately sweet dampness that pairs well with a lot of things. Classic weed flavor. Not pure sugar, not pure funk.
Sensation: Swimmingly Smooth Like The Smell Suggests
It’s a light, fun strain that’s down for a good time, and when I say down for a good time, I mean like a day spent enjoying the sun at a beach or a picnic, not the getting freaky between the sheets kind, but honestly, now that I think about it, could probably be that kind of down too.
The high is pretty gradual, giving you plenty of time to prepare for the liftoff. It’s not one of those “oh holy shit I’m suddenly high AF” strains. It’s a you’re getting higher incrementally kind of thing.
So it’s worth pointing out that, given the friendly take-off, this could be a beginner-friendly strain just as well as a wake-and-bake kind of strain. Fully functional. Chill mode but not sleepy.
Smoking Stuffed Cherry Gelato seems to lighten my mood. It makes focusing on fun hypothetical dreams of the future a cool game in which you have full control.
I found myself migrating from chill dub playlists to Ibiza lounge, and that kind of hit the sweet spot for satisfying my ear munchies.
Stuffed Cherry Gelato hasn’t induced any insane munchies yet. I’ve cooked some pretty quality dinners though, which is a result of the stony chill energy that this strain imparts. This is a kind of high you can complete pretty complex tasks on; it’s not inebriating or couch-locking at all, which is pretty neat.
Summary: Munchies & Chill Weed
Uplifting, as Leafly-speak as that sounds, is probably actually a very apt description for this sensation. The more exciting element here is the flavor, as touched upon.
If you are a big fan of Gelato strains, especially those that lean more sweet fruit, check out Watermelon Gelato; if you’re a big fan of the gas, Jet Fuel Gelato may be more to your liking.
So with that I’m wrapping this review and going to make some dinner. Got cornbread-stuffed pork chops, squash, and brussels sprouts to cook up.
Wish me luck.
Surely sounding stoned smiling softly