This quarter-ounce of Ice Cream Cake, grown by Herbal Dynamics and picked up at Oregrown, went down so smoothly that I barely got this review done before I’d finished it.
Yes, friends, it is that good.
Apparently, there are two strains called Ice Cream Cake. There’s one that is the child of Cheesecake and Dream Cookie, but this particular one from Herbal Dynamics is the double dolce result of crossing Wedding Cake and Gelato #33.
I haven’t smoked Herbal Dynamics for a while (aside from their exceptional Nitro Fumez) and have been wanting to try Ice Cream Cake, although I think I was holding off because I wanted to try Wedding Cake alone first before taking the step to Ice Cream Cake.
That said, here I am, down to my last nug of Ice Cream Cake, staring blazed AF into the mirror and asking myself questions like:
Do my eyes always look like this, or is it allergies?
and
Is this weed “top 5” or, dare I say, a “TOP 3” favorite?
Yeah, I really liked this cannabis; smoked it fast as hell and had to force myself to mix up my rotation a bit instead of just defaulting to it.
But, one must ask, just as the ancients have continually pondered over millennia, ripping fatties under the stars and asking themselves, y tho?
Appearance: Sex Appeal For Days
These nugs were the big fat ones that I like. These nugs can make it clap. If you stretched skin over these nugs, they’d have a bit of cellulite. Get it? Got it? Good. But it doesn’t stop there…
This Ice Cream Cake looks equally appetizing under natural, warmer light tones, where the purples are more muted and blended with the green, giving it a soft, creamy appearance, like, well, Gelato.
In warm light, it looks bathed in golden trichome dust, like a light sepia filter has been slid over my eye. In the bright white LED light of my Smokus Focus, the purples and oranges really come to life.
It’s beautiful either way you look at it.
The buds are broad, tall, and bulbous in all the right places. The texture is DENSE. The density of these buds is like an undercooked, dark-fudge-chunk brownie compared to my other inventory, which is more like a regular spongy cake. There’s that much less air in between bracts and sugar leaves.
This Ice Cream Cake reminds me of circus peanuts and astronaut ice cream, just dense and sweet and creamy.
What’s cooler is that once you actually break it apart, there are hidden delights inside, in the form of bright flashes of deep royal purple. I haven’t seen that intensity on the inside of a bud that I can remember. I’m a bit mesmerized, I must say.
Now, none of this is to say these bugs have been vacuum-packed to death or anything; they’re dense, not HARD. Breaking them up is easy, and Herbal Dynamics has done a great job curing them to have just enough moisture content for maximum flavor.
Honestly, appearance for me here, in addition to texture, is a solid 10/10. It’s a quality product like this that makes craft cannabis so great. Now, the next time I see Herbal Dynamics on a menu, I’ll have a strong positive association and probably jump down to see which strain it is.
That is the power of doing good, honest business and putting out legitimately great products.
Smell: Barista-grade Craft Cannabis
People say they get fruit from this, but the closest I get is like taking a big whiff of freshly melted Neapolitan ice cream or something. Maybe there is some subtle berry mixed in with all that cream, like in a raspberry cream cheese kind of way, but it is slight.
Ice Cream Cake is soft and gentle on your nose, like an expensive brand of tissue paper “engineered” to prevent red, rough noses.
There’s also a blue-bottle Nivea lotion smell in there, almost soap-like but more fragrant than soap, like a small white-petaled flower.
Sniffing back-to-back makes my Donny Burger smell sooooo much more onion-y, and it makes for the perfect moisturizing contrast to the eighth of Maui Wowie I’m working through at the same time.
Ice Cream Cake is what you use to soothe yourself after a hot day out in the sun. Double Dolce, no doubt.
So on the spectrum, I’d put Ice Cream Cake at cream, the already melting Oreo-flavored ice cream cake, plain white frosting, served to you by your friend’s busty mom who’s just lathered up her hands with that sweet, sweet Nivea.
Sensation: Cuts Like a Warm Ice Cream Scoop Through Gelato
It’s rich. It’s smooth. It’s refreshing. It makes you want to put on some sweatpants. Makes you want to lie down for a little bit and just enjoy it. This ICC cultivar could have been named ‘Treatzza Pizza’ (if you know, you know), and it would be an equally apt description.
The internet seems convinced this leans more on the indica side, and judging by the calm lack of energy, I’d say that’s in the right ballpark.
The mellowing out was like dipping into a warm pool, warm enough to make you want to get up to your ears and just float there for a bit like a soft, meaty wonton in a bowl of soup.
Considering I’ve been smoking Maui Wowie pretty exclusively the last couple of days, the creamy, cakey, moist embrace of Ice Cream Cake is a welcome change of pace in that it’s back to that familiar, chilled-out indica experience that I historically have more often than not defaulted to.
I ended up reaching for Ice Cream Cake in the evenings. Maybe some of that was a subconscious association with dessert, but it’s well-earned because I think this smoke was some of the smoothest, creamiest I’ve had in a while.
Dry-pulling air through a joint of Ice Cream Cake has the same whetting effect on my smoke appetite as grinding coffee beans in the morning.
I could function in social settings with this weed, but I’d prefer not to. This is more music/nature or blog post-writing type weed, in my opinion. The high is very smooth in the build-up, then just kind of sets in like a cozy-ass, thick-ass shawl-collared cardigan or something.
The terpene profile on this is soft and fuzzy, nothing sharp or pointy. It’s a sweet, smooth experience with depth. Think of a post-French Toast cortado, made with a velvety-smooth shot of Ethiopian espresso.
I think this is definitely a classic and will have some serious long-term staying power as it scores top marks in all categories, from appearance to smell to sensation.
Seed Junky Genetics breeds some excellent genetics. Animal Mints, Georgia Pie, Emergen-C, Pancakes, The Soap, and of course, all the Wedding Cake variations are all the purvey of Seed Junky. Hit after mother fucking hit.
Ice Cream Cake is another excellent strain you should definitely check out if you see it, because I’m pretty confident it has earned a place in my top 5 all-time favorites.
